Before we arrived at the URJ Camp Newman for summer camp, my sons told me that I WAS playing in the camp’s Ultimate Frisbee game this summer. No excuses. No made-up last minute meetings to attend. Their dad was to join the staff team in their annual Ultimate Frisbee combat against the CITs (Counselors in Training).

Little known fact: their dad played on the Trinity College (Hartford, CT) Ultimate Frisbee Team for at least half a semester, though I have no recollection of competing in a tournament. More likely, my college roommates, slightly embarrassed that I would be lettering only in Varsity Religion, cajoled me into joining the team with them.

However, Dad’s now 44, the average age of the camp players is 18, and this camp game, a highlight of each week, is intense. Taking place after camp nikayon (cleanup) but before personal nik (“shower for Shabbat”), the game is athletically challenging and exhausting. In days gone by, this game saw its share of sprained ankles and broken bones. So I readily admit that I was a tad ambivalent, or more truthfully, a bit concerned about playing. Would I be able to keep up with all those college kids, including one female Rosh (unit head) Samara who plays varsity Ultimate over at UCLA and can throw down field with precision that amazes? In the back of my mind I had fears of spending the rest of the summer with crutches. (Apparently my wife did too; she made sure the Camp Doctor was around when I took the field.)

Well, I had my 5 minutes of fame on the Ultimate Frisbee field, ratcheting myself up in the eyes of the boys. I did okay too! Still, more significant than any single play I made (or missed), was the fact that I stretched myself to do something new and scary. ‘Cause that’s what we do at camp. And that’s what makes Jewish summer camp so special.

Every summer, a few thousand Jewish kids come to the URJ Camp Newman for a summer of fun, friends, vibrant Judaism and personal growth. The most common refrain from older campers and staff about why they love camp (coming after “making new friends” and “spiritual Shabbat”) is that they grew so much during each summer.

Imagine going away to a place where love is boundless, where every adult is tasked with making sure you feel valued and loved. Imagine being with a group of people who truly believe – as it says in Genesis – that you were created b’tzelem Elohim, in the image of God, and therefore are special, unique, worthy and valued.

That’s summer camp. No pressure from school assignments, parental smothering and worry. No social pressure. Just acceptance and love.

Kids learn quickly to try new things. This kid, afraid of heights, nonetheless tries to climb the 50 foot tower. She makes it only halfway up, and upon descending, smiles widely and proclaims victory, “Last year I only made it up 1/4 of the way.” That teen, born with two left feet, tries Israeli dancing chug (activity) and finds himself performing before 300 people at the end of the session. Another one sits at a potter’s wheel and creates a beautiful pot, her first ever “successful” artistic creation. Camp removes the judgment from the process, allowing kids to do what we hope they would: spread their wings and try to fly.

So I flew. In fact, that’s me flying in the air, wearing the dark green shirt, in the picture at the top of the page. I made one diving slap at the frisbee, knocking it (we think) out of the way. The other team scored eventually against my line anyway. Didn’t matter. Because Rabbi Paul, facing the fears, played in the Staff-CIT Ultimate Frisbee game. I did it! And though I ended up pretty winded, I showed my boys – and myself – that Camp’s the Ultimate Experience of taking that chance and soaring to new heights.

The Jewish Journal emailed a bit ago, looking for anecdotes about camp pranks. As a former camp director, head counselor and camper, I have many (mostly) fond memories of some rather creative camp pranks. One of my favorites was highlighted in the Jewish Journal this week:

“Camp is a place of freedom, where everything is measured against fun. Is it fun? Are we having a good time? Pranks are a part of that,” said Rabbi Paul Kipnes of Congregation Or Ami in Woodland Hills, who directed Camp Hess Kramer in Malibu, and still goes up to the Reform movement’s camp in Santa Rosa to teach every summer.

Kipnes’ favorite prank happened when he was the head counselor at Kutz Camp in the Catskills in the late 1980s. Kipnes came back from a day off to find his personal belongings carefully placed on his bunk floor, surrounded by wall-to-wall Dixie cups full of what he soon found out was toilet water.

As head counselor, he got back at the perpetrators — all of them now prominent rabbis in the Reform movement — by scheduling them for double night-watch duty followed by early morning breakfast set-up.

Thankfully, camps now control the pranks (or so say my children) such that they are tame and fun. Isn’t that what camp is all about?

Camp is winding down. I am so sad. It has been a great, uplifting time:

• 2 weeks of walking around in shorts and sandals, celebrating Shabbat for 25 hours, shmoozing Jewish breakfast through bedtime.
• Relaxed. Refreshed.
• Hanging with my posse of Or Ami kids (and other LA area friend’s kids).
• Climbing the 50′ tower – okay, I didn’t make it to the top but I got farther than in year’s past.
• Exploring Kol HaOlam Kulo (the whole Jewish world), our eidah (unit) theme.
• Rocking to music of Jewish rocker Dan Nichols (dancing, of course, in the back of the Beit Tefilah (prayer amphitheater) so I don’t embarrass my kids).
• Reconnecting with the same camp friends (rabbis, educators, cantors, spouses/partners) with whom we have been attending camp for the last 15 years.
• Eating three meals a day prepared by someone else and cleaned up by someone else (we do have to bus our own plates, however).
• Watching my kids have the times of their lives, schepping nachas (sharing the joy) with them, without having to be responsible for them for two weeks.
• Watching, amazed, at how wonderfully these college and grad school aged counselors and administrators help kids and teens through the daily ups and downs of life.
• Creating a Facebook page with its moderated “Or Ami Graduate Connection” group so we can keep in touch with our Or Ami graduates (it is amazing when our B’nai Mitzvah students keep in touch once they go off to college).
• Shooting archery while receiving shooting tips from a patient specialist half my age.
• Going wine tasting with friends (designated driver chosen and responsible) and figuring out that Beaucanon and Cuvaison wineries are our favorites this trip.
• Eating Its It ice cream sandwiches on Shabbat for snack.
• Teaching college students Jewish texts about abortion and choice and then having a great discussion about it with them (the camp schedules special time for the college students to enjoy continuing Jewish education).
• Bonding with my wife Michelle.
• Realizing that I have enough underwear to go to camp for 2 weeks, changing them at least once a day, yet not having to do laundry (I’ve grown up… my Mom tells the story of the year, as a young child, that I came home from camp with packages unopened)
• Having a camp party with my Or Ami kids.
• Hiring great staff for our Mishpacha and Temple Teen Night programs.

The list goes on and on. It has been a great run! Shabbat begins this afternoon, and when it ends, we are off for a few days of vacation as we meander our way home. Its sunset at Camp Newman for Rabbi Paul and Michelle. We’ll miss Camp Newman!!!

Our children have been attending URJ Camp Newman Jewish summer camp in Santa Rosa, CA since they were born. First as faculty kids and more recently as camper in their own right.

At the end of this week, as I depart from camp for a few days of vacation, we will leave our older two children in the capable hands of their counselors and Camp Directors. Pondering this new reality – that the kids will be at camp without us – has led me to consider anew why I chose to send my children to Camp Newman. I realized that I used similar criteria when choosing a summer camp for my children as I do when hiring staff for the synagogue.

Hiring Synagogue Staff
Over the years, I have developed four criteria which have led me to hire some really incredible Jewish professionals to work at Congregation Or Ami in Calabasas, CA. I try to evaluate a candidate based on whether they demonstrate a:

• commitment to the vision/mission of the synagogue
• compassion (Who wants to work with or for someone who isn’t compassionate in his/her relationships, work or play?)
• creativity (I am always looking for people to advance the mission of our synagogue through means I have not yet thought about considered)

The fourth criteria is not as easily discerned. Sometimes I can tease it out from their responses to questions or in discussions with the candidate’s references. Sometimes I need to go with my gut. Usually, I find out pretty quickly if the person is up to the task. The fourth criteria is whether the candidate has:

• the ability to handle difficult or unexpected situations when they arise

“Stuff happens.” Stuff always happens. You can try to plan and plan for every eventuality. But no amount of planning can ensure that the people on the ground are capable to carry out the plan when the “stuff hits the fan.” You only know that when the “stuff happens” and you can watch how people respond.

Choosing A Summer Camp
Similarly, if I am going to leave my three precious kinder (children) for a number of weeks at a summer camp, I want to ensure that the camp staff members:

• Believe in the mission of Reform Movement Jewish summer camping
• Treat my children with compassion and caring, even when they become tired, cranky or worse
• Creatively deliver experiences to my children which will stretch them Jewishly, athletically, artistically, socially and emotionally.

I also want to be sure that the staff – from the veteran senior administrators through the greenest counselor – have:

• The ability to handle the difficult or unexpected situations when they arise.

You see, camp is like a play. You write the script and rehearse, rehearse and plan. But once the curtain goes up (and the summer starts), you can only hope that the people you put in place have the ability to handle the stuff that happens.

Camp Newman Staff Excel at the Unexpected!
Having been a camp director for four summers in Malibu, I know that all camps face unanticipated eventualities. Here at Camp Newman, watching from up close during this past week and a half, I find myself continually more and more impressed with the ability of these staff members – especially the senior staff – to handle every eventuality. Counselors puts in long hours and longer days under the hot sun and in warm cabins. They nurture six to eight wonderful and kvetchy campers, moving them through activities. With the guidance of their incredible group of rashim (unit heads) – I am fortunate to work closely with two talented young rashim Amanda and Yoni – these counselors repeatedly rise to the occasion. Up close, I have watched them care for two homesick campers, both of whom are now thoroughly enjoying themselves. I have witnessed the compassion they displayed when one teen sprained her ankle and another younger one got stung by a bee.

Over the years I have seen this senior staff team deal with a multitude of significant issues: broken bones, mechanical or plumbing problems, challenging staffing issues, children with serious emotional challenges, and more. In each case, the senior staff – Camp Director Ruben Arquilevich and Senior Associate Camp Director Sam Roberts standing out among them – handle each “mini-crisis” with confidence and a calm demeanors.

Though Nothing Happened, I was Exceedingly Impressed
I remember some time ago watching Sam Roberts take charge of a potentially difficult situation. There he was: Under Ruben’s watchful eye, dispassionately evaluating the situation. Gathering his senior staff to invite their advice and then detailing a plan. Meeting with the faculty to inform us of the situation and prepare us for possible outcomes. He was clear, open, non-defensive, assured. He listened to our questions and updated his plan when new perspectives or information came to light. That summer I left the camp feeling comfortable and confident that camp was safe and that the camper’s safety was paramount. Of course, the beauty of the situationwas that nothing happened. The problem dissipated. But Sam, Ruben and their staff members were prepared just in case.

That’s Why I Send my Children to the URJ Camp Newman
Because this committed, compassionate, creative staff possesses the ability to handle the difficult or unexpected situations when they arise. Because “just in case,” they are prepared and professional. And because I know that my own kids are cared for as well as if I were in charge of them myself.

There’s something about being at the URJ Camp Newman Jewish summer camp that reminds me of being at our Congregation Or Ami. Perhaps it is the fact that I am surrounded by so many Or Ami kids – Michelle and I are leading a delegation of about 18 this summer. Perhaps interacting here with so many current and former Or Ami interns – Rabbi Alissa Forrest visited, Educator Josh Barkin, Mishpacha teachers Jonathan Fisch-Rothstein, Jordana Chernow-Reader and Luke Reader, incoming Mishpacha Coordinator Sara Mason – brings Or Ami up here to the Napa Valley area.

However, it may just be the fact that Camp Newman shares similar values with Congregation Or Ami – a commitment to community, a depth of caring, the centrality of music and singing, a dedication to social justice, and an inspiring creativity. Or it may just be that Or Ami grew out of the experience of many people who grew up in the Reform Movement summer camps and NFTY (North American Federation of Temple Youth). Perhaps these creative Jewish institutions gave birth to the influences that shaped, and continue to shape, Or Ami. Now that is an article worth pondering.

For now, enjoy these pictures of Or Ami kids and the children of friends of ours. Enjoy!

There are those who say that when you send a child to summer camp, you present him with the time of his life. I say that when you send a child to summer camp, you provide him with an opportunity to set – or re-set – the course of his life.

We have arrived at Camp Newman in Santa Rosa, the Union for Reform Judaism’s premier Jewish summer camp in Northern California. Michelle and I are leading a delegation of 18 children (including our own three) who have chosen to transform their lives through the magic of Jewish summer camping.

Driving through the front gates on opening day, we were welcomed with a resounding chorus of “Heveynu Shalom Aleichem – We welcome you all!” sung by teen Avodaniks committed to spreading the joy of Camp Newman. Registering with the senior staff, each child is warmly welcomed by a counselor in her eidah (or unit), who sweeps her up in a warm embrace and immediately begins to introduce her to other staff and campers. Old friends reunite; new friendships begin to blossom before my eyes.

Driving through the front gates of camp offers another opportunity – to set aside, at least temporarily, the pressures and challenges of the previous eleven months. Children come to camp, relieved to let go of the pressures of school, the pain of difficult familial relationships, the nagging questions of self-worth. At camp, the athletically-challenged kid finds space to excel; the socially-uncomfortable teen suddenly discovers popularity in a crowd of well-adjusted friends. At camp, you can be who you are, or whomever you want to be. You have arrived at a place where acceptance is unconditional. No one is more welcome at Camp Newman than you!

Michelle and I spent the day checking in on our Congregation Or Ami posse. Though spread out throughout camp – from the youngest Bonim campers to the second oldest Avodanikim – these children were adjusting well and falling comfortably into the warm embrace of a healthy, nurturing Jewish environment. What could be any more wonderful than that!